Put them down, Stiles
by Hoechy
Summary: Kind of AU-y, but not really. The scene from 3A where the pack is in the hospital and are looking for things to take down the twins...Stiles picks up some defibrillators and Derek tells to him to put it down. Yea, well in my version Derek saying that to Stiles reminds Stiles of the time Derek said something similar in a s-x shop. Inspired by: bitly/1yzWDU9


"Put them down," Derek says with a stern voice. Stiles has to study the defibrillators – not that he knows how to use them, or knows much about them at all other than their name for that matter – once again before he rests them back on the table, taking particular care to make sure he does so very carefully. He looks up at Derek who is still staring at him while his hands sort through an array of boxes and tubes in a nearby cabinet next to Peter. There's a flicker of comical concern in his eyes, something that just screams _I'm in love with this idiot and I want everybody to know it_. It's a look that Stiles recognises from that one time he and Derek visited a sex shop down some dusty back alley.

Derek led the way through the front door, Stiles following chipperly in suit behind him. He was giddy, like a kid on his way to a candy store. When he passed the threshold of the store, which was adorned with a giant pink sign with calligraphic red writing (that was probably meant to be something luxuriously-lusty) in the window that read 'Krystal's Cauldron of Candy and Chains', his nose immediately scrunched up at the smell of something horribly sweet. Derek just chuckled at the boy who was obviously new to this…not that Derek himself was entirely experienced in browsing sex shops, but he clearly had more experience than his high-school boyfriend.

"Oh, my God!" Stiles said through a choke and a cough as his tongue stuck out in every which direction while he swatted the air in front of his face. "W–What is that like sugar in a freaking spray bottle or something?"

There were only two other people in the store – one of who was obviously Krystal, her bleached blonde hair, almost orange skin, large breasts, and strawberry-red lips being a dead giveaway – but Derek still kept his voice hushed. "It's the whole experience, D." He inhaled deeply, mockingly. "You've got to live it." He said chuckling as he picked up some cube-thing in a box. "Just have a look around, see what you like. I know what I want, but if you see anything you like, let me know and I'll get it."

Stiles looked around. The shop would be dismal if not for the plethora of brightly-coloured objects it housed. Stiles noticed a few mannequins hanging high on the wall – they were 'wearing', if you can call it that, laced _things_ and were strewn with feathery scarves (restraints?) and handcuffs. _Definitely going to stay away from those_, Stiles thought to himself. He continued to browse the store, looking over at Derek who already was holding a few things, none of which were brightly coloured like the rest of the stuff in the store. Of course Derek had managed to find the only dull coloured versions of the objects in the store. It's a skill. Seriously.

Stiles continued to browse while Derek went to the counter to pay for the things he obviously had already decided on before even walking in the door – among which Stiles spotted a pair of the feathered handcuffs (black feathers, though) that he wanted to avoid. Stiles came across an odd egg-looking thing which he picked up and studied for a little while. When he was young, he had a little egg-shaped speaker that his dad bought him. Clearly this was not one of those, but he was intrigued by it, not having seen anything else like it in the store. It was purple, not surprisingly, really, and had a ring at the bottom that looked like it could be pulled, and that's exactly what Stiles did.

He slipped the ring out of the sleeve it was tucked into a pulled it slowly at first, but when nothing obvious happened he tugged it harder. What followed caused him to jump back in fright. The egg seemed to grow almost double the size in a matter of seconds, like it was a balloon that had just been instantly inflated with air. Maybe pulling the ring slowly was the correct way to…'operate' the thing.

Still holding the odd object between two fingers, far away from him like it was something foul, recovering from hitched breath you get after a fright, Stiles looked over at Derek who was standing at the counter, bag in one hand, the other hand on his hip.

"Hey! What about…this…thing?" Stiles said, trying to cover up the embarrassing _whateverthehell_ he just did.

"Do you know what it does, Stiles?" Derek said looking at him, biting back a smile, because he obviously did know what it was and what it did. Derek enjoyed having the upper hand in cute little situations like this that he'd one day be able to tease Stiles about.

"Well…no, b–" Started stiles, but before he could finish, Derek interrupted him, because if he didn't he was going to break out in a fit of laughter and the only way to stop him would have been to kiss Stiles.

"Put them down," He said as he walked towards the boy. He grabbed his arm, smiled back at Krystal who wiggled her orange little fingers back at them (clearly she wished Derek played for her team, but hey, that's one thing she can't be blamed for), and walked out. Stiles's cheeks had turned a colour similar to that of Krystal's red lipstick because boy was he embarrassed. _At least_, he thought, _I can make Derek forget all about how embarrassing that was when we get home._


End file.
